Deployment To Do: Episode 1

Over the years, there have been many occasions which called for me to entertain myself.  Deployment, and my husband being gone is no different.  This is just another opportunity for the silly in me to come out.  I do hope you will enjoy this segment, and those to come, as this is only the beginning of an arduously lengthy list.  It is with great pleasure, I give you my silly "Deployment To Do" list of things that I do (or that just happen) when hubby's away.

1. Watch as two of your cats (Haru and Ryo) chase each other through the house, causing one of them to fly toward the coffee table, miss, and do a 360 degree back flip, landing him on the table hard enough to create a momentary daze.  As you leap up to insure your cat is still breathing, watch as his pal leaps up from under the table like, 'I totally bodyslammed him!'
2. Rescue cat from freezer after he opens it himself and jumps inside.
3. Wonder how cat got in the freezer by himself.
4. Watch in horror as cat climbs door and stands on the top of it so you cannot close it.  Waste 15 minutes trying to figure out how to get him down, when water-spraying doesn't work.
5. Play peek-a-boo with Buffy the Vampire Slayer's tits because apparently no one on TV wears bras anymore. -- After all, you're not getting any from anywhere...may as well enjoy the free show.
6. Buy a photo board, hang it above your bed.  Be sure to put your favorite photo of your mother-in-law in the board. -- I mean, you gotta have some kind of practical joke up your sleeve when the hubby returns, right?
7. Buy a betta fish in the name of rescuing him from the evil clutches of Wal*Mart.  Name him Jynx in an attempt to avoid being jinxed throughout the rest of the deployment.  This is lame of course, but it's a fun way to have a good luck charm.
8. Take photos of hubby's favorite cat.  Insure that the eyes glow demonically.
9. Send your man messages as your drunken alter-ego.  If you're lucky, he'll have an opportunity to drink, too, wake up the next morning, and ask himself who the hottie his wife let borrow her phone is.
10. Fart.  As loudly as you please.  Blame it on the cats.

And this completes our first session of Giggle Ops.  I hope everyone enjoyed it.